Modern Women

Posted on 19/06/2016 by Dailyexcelsior

Ticktack, ticktack….and here you go…your body clock is ticking five in the morning, oh no…not again…how you wish it wasn’t, but then what the h*** such is life and you somehow manage to push yourself yet again against the wish of your reflexes to go straight to your mission…awaiting in those four walls of a ‘holy’ kitchen. While you are doing this… your mind is working on that…what next…hurry…c’mon… what after this…and eyes on a constant look out for what is over in that Burney or a jar, what new to bring, what else to dispose, how to preserve…Oh my God you just can’t ignore those dust granules which keep finding their way back… and oh no how about those things that are left here and there, everywhere, except for their ‘sacred’ place…..Once all this and that of your ‘thankless’ job-cum-moral duty is done… you still manage to erect your back, get back to your sanity and stand somehow straight yet again to answer all the queries about those all-the-time whereabouts, complains, nagging fits and yet be ready with the answers for all that is not good enough in the house…hey, hey wait a minute, did I just say house, then what about each one’s personal, professional, emotional and all the rest of the baggage like work pressure, overtime, failure of meeting deadlines, break-up stress, performance appraisal anxiety etc etc, all that gets carried home….who takes care of this or rather let me put it this way, who bears the brunt of all of this?? None other than the LADY of the house!
My mom took care of all this and even more, certainly well, her mom too did it and passed it on, besides I am guessing even her mom too did it happily and felt such proud. But what the h*** why has it been passed on to a woman of this Century, who is born in a different time for a different mission and for God’s sake…just try asking her once….she certainly don’t wish to go against her wish and work diligently to please everyone else but herself!What about her? Who will take care of her?No…please don’t say ‘Mata rani’ this time!
There is a strange thought that’s making even greater noise this time than the usual about the idea of being a modern woman, a woman of this Century who perhaps is trapped in this fashionable highly confused traditional conservatism that dominates the majority of this so called ‘liberalised’,’ democratic’country.
Just imagine the plight of those self-sacrificing, well-mannered, soft spoken, hanji hanji types… piled with the tradition of dressing up as elaborately as possible, fasting on ‘karvachauth’ every year for the well-being of their ‘respected husbands’,apart from other traditional ‘fasts’ every now and then to safeguard the health of the only males, which might be giving a fake-boostto the morale of these good, moralistic, ritualistic ideal women. But hang on…what if you choose not to starve? Does it imply that you are somewhat ‘differently-abled’ or are drifting away from your roots or have less compassion for your own family members?What if you choose to question the tradition which only loves to celebrate the patriarchal festivals like bhaidooj, rakshabandhan, Shivratri etc? Are you then inviting the trouble of branding yourself as the Enemy No. 1? Rightly said by TV journalist Sagrika Gosh in one of her interviews, “Glorification of wife-hood is seen as anti-national, anti-tradition, in short a spoilsport. No wonder increasingly the modern woman is Public Enemy No. 1.”
There is no denying the fact that we are a patriarchal society and by that I am not saying that all women are oppressed and depressed here, well there are a few, who choose not to be and don’t even want to be in the ‘good books’ of everyone around and by all means I am not at all pointing any fingers at men for all that is not right. The only point I am trying to emphasize here is that women need to be tough and take firm stand especially in tough times, look at Draupadi for example.She is one such woman, who, while doing all her ‘rightful’ duties,took a bold stand. She declared a war with the Kauravas long before it really happened in the battlefield of Kurukshetra. J.F. Kennedy in modern times is known for saying that it is ok to dream and Draupadi,too,in ancient times,believed that it is ok sometimes for women to take a stand.
Modernity is not at all about wearing some weird bold outfits, or trying to gulp some real good amount of that taste-less, extremely rotten liquor, and worse still, if someone tries to rate him/herself more traditional by opposing or even commenting on someone else’s dressing style etc(how cheap!).Curtailing someone’s democratic rights like freedom to work, freedom to travel, freedom to wear what she likes is not which needs anybody’s ‘approval’ or ‘go ahead’.This country got freedom from the ‘Raj’ in 1947, so it’s a hello…wake-up call for those who take ‘privilege’ by ‘allowing’ someone to avail their most basic fundamental rights.
It’s us to chose how we should be seen by others and remembered in the history.Whether as a person, who believed  in open-mindedness and swiftly  moved to modernity or a person who stiffly stands by all that,which at times, also becomes the cause of disharmony not just in a family but also in the society at large. Of course, I know I can’t change the way everyone thinks, and that I am alone, the desert is alone, but each of us has to make his way into the other, each smolder in his own fire and that we have yet to search each other!