I write because I feel!!

And some cry in between... Have you found or hunting your way through or you thought that you almost got your “prince charming”, well what makes you believe that even when you would meet your “MR RIGHT” or “ MR PERFECT ”…..things would move on easily from then now, trust me it’s no hunky-dory and who says falling in love is easy, forgetting about the pains and torture involved in convincing the supposedly “other half” that you are more than sure and know about the “eternal connection” between the two of you, phew and after all that proving of your love, I would still want to know from those who believe that falling in love is easy?? Falling in love is certainly not easy and equally or rather even more painful is to come out of it…..and do you even want to imagine a state in between?? Scary is the thought, and worse is the phase when you don’t know whether you are in love or out of it…but then people around would ask you how you feel or even cliché to close your eyes and try to figur...

“Uh-huh, life's like this, that's the way it is- COMPLICATED.” How many times can you fall in love with one person over and over again despite all odds and despite growing old apart? Well, many would agree and say that the “spark” despite separation, tears and hurt remains and grows only deeper with time, but it certainly is “complicated” to decide whether to be with someone or not to be with someone, especially once a separation “seal” put on a relationship seals it all. No doubt, it becomes rather difficult not to fall for the person, with whom you fell in love first and then got married later, perhaps even more difficult to be in “control of emotions” especially once the “flesh of your passion” (baby) is out and kicking. “It’s complicated” (movie 2009) is a story of Jane (Meryl Streep), who is a self-reliant divorce and owns a successful bakery in Santa Barbara, California. After ten years of separation and three grown children, she finally achieves a good relationship...

Calling up mom, especially when away from home, is so much fun and without failure, each time you call her up, you end up feeling so much "special”, being loved and cared for…Thank God life gets going when mama is on the roll!!! Today, when I called up mama in the morning to tell her that undoubtedly she is the Queen Of My Heart and wished her “Happy Women’s Day”…she first smiled (like she already read my mind) and then very softly asked me an “innocent” question…What do we do on Women's Day? I was quiet for a while, not knowing what exactly to say, but then some how collected myself and said: “We wish all the known and unknown women for being so special and just enjoy the spirit of the day”…and so fast I was done with the “seemingly easy question”, she smiled yet again as though giving me another chance to think? The conversation ended on the phone and now my mind started the “talking”. I started imagining (like I always do), a woman who believes she is good, a woman wh...

My name is not Khan and I am not a Muslim, but I just fell in love with the movie not because it has Shah-Rukh-Khan, simply because it is beyond being a Khan or a Muslim.

Not many would agree when I say I simply “love cooking”. In times of junk and processed foods it is often considered “madness” to sweat it out in the kitchen. But my love for cooking is growing deeper and meaning full these days and now I am very certain that "Cooking and falling in love are both very seductive processes. One has to let lose a little to experiment, to feel things and for sure to try things that one would not really try otherwise.” “Cooking” and “love” can both be hot and steamy affairs that not only require a little training, but also lots of effort. I wonder how can one who loves to eat, which most us do, can resist the temptation of not to try out those mouthwatering, lip-smacking goodies and celebratory meals that bind families and friends. Food has always been the way to explore other cultures and most importantly the best part of any travel. Bard, an American journalist and historian, fell in love with a Frenchman during a trip to Paris, married him and moved...

“ Aisi ulji nazar unse hatt ti nahi Daant se reshmi dor katt ti nahi Umar kab ki baras ke safaid ho gayi Kaari badari jawani ki chatt ti nahi Walla ye dhadkan bhadne lagi hai Chehre ki rangat udne lagi hai Darr lagta hai ishq karne mein ji ” Well writing a blog on a song…how trivial can one get, but how amazingly this triviality has been put in such beautiful Urdu dialect that I just can’t stop myself to say and agree with “ Dil to bachcha hai ji ” … Sometimes its better not to write too much and just flow with others’ thoughts, never enjoyed the depth and pain of “helplessness” as easily ever before…

Fresh are those childhood memories and I can still picture my classmate’s father (an uprooted Kashmiri) playing with him on my school playground. Every afternoon, during lunch break, he would come to the school to enjoy lunch with his son, would go through his notebooks, play with him and both father-son would be in a different world, talking a language (Kashmiri) which most of us didn’t understand in the plains (Jammu) in the early 90’s. Our fathers grew up in a different time, when a man was expected to show little or no emotion. Their bonding was admirable and like my classmate, even I used to wait to see a perfect father-son or rather an older and a younger friend, playing together with no inhibitions, sharing lunch and then those endless talks, as though they were running against time to finish all their talking. Lesser did my classmate know that one day when he would enter into his dad’s shoes to share much beyond his innocent talks, someone known would kill him. So small is this...

I often tried not to trust those oceanic deep twinkling eyes, For they always speak a language not matching with their words; Often fell for those true eyes, Just too pure and too honest in aught to disguise the sweet soul shining through them; The spark in those eyes just told me every thing that words otherwise would not have been able to express… How foolish I was to fall for those seemingly genuine eyes… And even tried to create a road from the eye to the heart, which I thought would not go through the intellect… How could those soulful eyes leave me alone and betray me…. And now I feel it would have been better to trust my ears than to trust those deceptive eyes???

So do you know which generation you belong to, whether Gen X or Y or are you still in a fix?? This thought passed my mind while watching “Love Aaj Kal”. I always thought “Love” a few years ago was selfless and admirable and thought, if at all, I would fall in love, it would be of that era when love was not considered a “stupidity” and most importantly was not a “calculative affair”. Finding the “right guy” that “clicked”, whom one sees and the bells start ringing in ears is considered bogus these days. Reality hits me hard every day when people of both generations (X and Y) tell me that one has to be “real” and often tell me that “bells ringing” in this time and age is a bit too much to expect. People I know of Gen X think that its “childish” and “immature”, and feel that one has to change with time. My own peer group feels that to live in this era and then expect things of yester years is “unreal”. But why can’t we have best of both worlds? I asked this to a councellor aunt and...

Their desires, hates, and concerns have been silenced… Welcome to their world of “dark chronicles of broken heart…” Just before you pity them for what they are and decide to teach them how to be real, practical and less selfish…think again!!! They are the chosen ones to bring life into this world, love flows in every drop of their blood, for most of them it’s “U” that comes first then “I”. So what if with changing times their role seems to be reversed, as they have decided to step out and be there with you (men), for you, to match your steps, to prove to you, or to prove to themselves that they are special … Women….perhaps the most lovable creations of God were and still are craving for love, protection, being provided for, and are seeking security. Their feeling of insecurity is so strong that they are convinced that it is also objective truth. A woman's great need is to fill up that emptiness. Sadly she thinks that a man will fill it, which is only partly true. ...

A constant pressure is building up…not really able to figure out whether it’s from within or is it from the world outside that is busy taking stock of every inch that I move, who is trying to understand whom, whether it’s me, who wants to understand the world inside out or is it the world that’s teaching me to outsmart the rest?? Question marks lingers and a vacuum prevails….a vacuum of thoughts, a vacuum of emotions, a vacuum that knows nothing and yet grows deeper and deeper… Life, which evolves and becomes meaningful by several inspirations (books, people, songs, lyrics, stories, etc); brain, which is just so impressionable and heart, which is always out to react, all this learnt behaviour or not so learnt behaviour, proves a sham to others whenever quoted or referred to. What is mine? Nothing… not even these words…they are also part of this learnt behaviour, that would also be soon under the scrutiny of some sharp eyes or mind that might not be reading it in between the lines...

Come on hold my hand, I wanna contact the living. Not sure I understand this role I have been given. I sit and talk to inner me and just laugh at my plans, My head speaks a language, I don’t understand…I think I just feel or may be I just want to feel that I think... Just when I was feeling that it’s time to put a break to what and how I feel about thousands things around and was trying hard not to feel and then think, I realised that we all feel and it’s just impossible to live life without feeling being alive. Keeping all logics aside, in which we try hard to fit ourselves best, I have decided now to come to terms with life and, thus, I feel that what is more important in life is about “how we feel” than any practical art applied to it, in which case why should we hide or not believe in what and how we feel? I feel about every thing around, may be it horrifies me many times and I get hurt almost every time I start feeling, but then I feel, think and believe that being human, it is j...